Letters to you... all about me

I like you, adore you even for exactly who you are at this point in time.  I love your charm and manliness and how you can easily drive me mad.  You challenge me but you also make me smile in huge fully open ways.  You make me want to be a better person and I know you’ll always hold me accountable to that.  You’re the man I want to speak with when life takes an unexpected turn because you have the ability to reassure me that it will all be okay, to just have faith and to believe.  Your belief in me reinforces my belief in myself.

You are amazing.  One of my strengths is my ability to see a person’s true character and I’ve learned to trust my intuition a lot this past year, knowing it’s guiding me down the road I need to be taking.  It led me to kissing you – know that I’m very selective not just in who I kiss but in who I let into my life.  My life is happy in this moment even in the face of the bumps along the way.

I’ve finally found myself through the years and I love the woman I am.  It’s because of this that I only surround myself with other great people and my life is bursting in this regard, I am truly blessed.  I don’t have a million friends in my inner circle but I’d go to the ends of the earth for the ones that are there.  You’re on this list.

Know that kissing you was unexpected.  Unplanned.  It took me by surprise as much as it did you but it just felt right in that moment and I went with it.  I trust in the timing – it wasn’t six months ago or six months from now or anytime in between, it was that moment a few weeks back – the reason is still unclear.

I care about you, fully – it’s the way I live life.  When I said I was an all or nothing woman it’s is just that – I don’t feel things half way, for anyone that gets close. It’s who I am and something I love.  And it doesn’t mean anything more than that – you are a part of my life and I care.  What the future holds I don’t know but I’m grateful you are here now for however long and in whatever capacity that is, no expectations, just a trust in the journey. 

I understand you had a solid plan going before I came along – you still do.  I think that’s admirable – know where you’re at as I’ve been there too this past year.   I accept it and you for where you are and maybe one day things will evolve but only time will tell and as I said, I have no expectations.  I do enjoy the time we spend together, getting to know your stories and laughing and teasing and yes, exploring each other’s bodies.   I want to be vulnerable with you in more ways than just my naked body but I find myself holding back right now because I’m afraid of you thinking it’s too much – know it’s just what we make of it and I’m not asking you for anything other than the time you want to spend with me – easy and carefree and simple – I’m way beyond drama and difficulties, life is too short for any of that.  So let’s just be us and have fun – our paths crossed in this moment for however long and for whatever reason, let’s just have faith in that and enjoy the ride.