Letters to you… thank you

Thank you for…

-showing me what I can have, what I want, what I deserve

-teaching me the beauty of compassion and connection to people and the world

-letting me touch your heart with my bare hands if only for a brief moment

-sharing your love

-looking at me with sparkling eyes

-your tears and fears in the face of it all, unmasked emotion, honest and real

-unprotected connections, a soulful link that I’ve never felt before, complete ecstasy

-allowing me to care for you for a time and for taking  care of me in return

-living together in the same space, our lives entwined so easily and seamlessly, the daily dance of life

-morning snuggles when your body molded with mine, fingers interlaced

-afternoon hugs in that space that I fit perfectly into under your arms, a welcome embrace coming home from the day

-electric kitchen touches over coffee, over dishes

-trusting in me and finding me your best friend

-embracing me, letting me into your family life, feeling their welcoming arms (even still)

-reminding me that my intuition is spot on and I have to trust it, voice it more clearly – to stand up for myself, my non-negotiables

-knowing that I have a huge heart and that it was yours for a while

-reinforcing my desire to be part of a team – full on, compromise and sharing – decisions and all – not one sided behavior

-embracing my sense of ridiculous and sometimes bratty behavior

-standing up to me when needed and for getting mad when required (it shows you’re human after all)

-making me remember how essential communication is even when it’s hard or it hurts

-listening and showing me the power in that (even as I forgot along the way)

-being a pillar of strength in the face of adversity

-knowing that my tears sometimes required advice and sometimes just strong arms to hold me tight

-gardening with me,wrestling vines and reading to jump all over the slithering creatures that might appear

-killing the cockroaches and ants without hesitation and yes, even for rescuing the spiders and setting them free

-pushing me to be my best

-providing what you could right back

-the adventures and experiences we shared through it all, new and old alike

-the ups and downs and just living life, honestly and real

-the drunken nights and handstands in the street

-warning me to be careful even as I laughed and foolishly did it anyway

-skyping with my family, with my best friend

-reminding me of my strength and self worth that I lost briefly in the face of it all

-leting me see the power in my love and my tears, giving freely without expectation

-grounding me

-valuing my opinions and looking to me for validation

-cheering me on when things got heavy or hard, just being on my side no questions asked

-good morning texts and lunch time calls

-releasing your burdens on me and letting me be your rock in those moments

-showing me what to tolerate and what to fight against

-leading me down the path of princes and knights and kings

-reminding me that I should never fear losing something so much that I lose myself in the process

-showing me that I deserve a man who chooses me fully – that doesn’t need to try while having one foot out the door (sabotaging from the start)

-showing me that I can love and be loved and that it can be easy and real and lasting with the boy who knows who he is and what he wants

-letting me embrace my felinity

-showing me that I can be happy in a partnership or on my own and feel lucky every night as my head hits the pillow, cherishing it all everyday

-letting me find my spiritual connections – my guides who even now still show me that you are my future

-revealing your true self, taking off your masks and revealing your brokenness even as it made you run away (again) in fear

-making me realize you are still a knight, bordering on the first stage of prince-dom, finding who he is and standing on his own

-stepping away even as it hurt knowing that I’m am stopped and you’re not ready for that yet, still moving forward, still figuring it out

-making me realize that adventures and experiences don’t stop just because you find your best friend and your paths are the same

-the little moments, the ones that matter more, most

-making a house feel like home

-filling our house with the sounds of your beautiful music

-giving me the confidence to sing out loud

-letting me be your refuge and your gift for a little while along the way

Thank you for being all of this for moments and for letting me share in them all.

Thank you for our time together albeit brief and now so distant.

Thank you for letting believe that we’ll come back together some day, standing as individuals, stronger together.

Thank you.